In a policy speech just moments ago, Donald Trump gave an inspiring speech echoing JFK’s promise to send a man to the moon.
“Up to this point, ISIS has been lightyears ahead of us in torturing Muslims, but I wont let ISIS out-tourture us anymore!”
“I will not stand idly by while a perfectly good spaceship [Trump referring to the space shuttle] just stands there waiting to have a Muslim strapped to it with a one-way ticket to the freaking moon.
We have corrupt government leadership! This is obvious to me because I tried to bribe them to do this but they refused to take my bribe!“
However, even Trump’s VP, Mike Pence, isn’t on board,
“I do have some doubts about Trump’s proposal. I just don’t think we have it in the budget to strap a Muslim to the space shuttle, launch it directly at the moon, and then shoot a laser-guided nuclear missile at the moon.”