“No one has made better deals with the devil than me,” said Donald Trump this morning.
Trump has repeatedly bragged that, “most people who make a deal with the devil get only a million bucks or something… I have an empire and buildings with my name on them!”
Trump continued, “all I had to do was be the symbol of hedonism my whole life, try to keep convicted rapist Mike Tyson from going to prison, and run for President without ever repenting of those things!”
Trump was thrilled, saying, “among other benefits, my genius devil-dealmaking allows me to pretend I’m worth 10 billion dollars!”
Unrelenting, Trump plans to make, “many more deals with the devil as President of the United States!“